Laughter: Medicine for the Soul
An elderly man went to see his cardiologist and had a lengthy consultation.
A couple of days later the cardiologist saw the old gentleman walking down the street arm-in-arm with a tall, elegant young woman.
The cardiologist stopped and talked to the old man, and he, of course, asked who the young woman was. The old man replied,”I am just following your advice, doc–she is my new girlfriend.”
The cardiologist was perplexed,”Advice? What advice?”
The old man replied,”You told me to get a hot momma and be cheerful!”
To which the cardiologist replied,”I said,”You have a heart murmur–be careful!”
“Doc, you’ve got to check my leg. Something’s wrong. Just put your ear up to my thigh, you’ll hear it!”
The doctor cautiously placed his ear to the man’s thigh only to her,”Give me twenty bucks, I really need twenty bucks.”
“I’ve never seen or heard anything like this before; how long has this been going on?” the doctor asked.
“That’s nothing, Doc, put your ear to my knee.”
The doctor put his ear to the man’s knee and heard it say, “Man, I really need ten dollars, just lend me ten bucks!”
“Sir, I really don’t know what to tell you. I’ve never seen anything like this.”
“Wait, Doc, that’s not it, there’s more, just put your ear up to my ankle,” the man urged him.
The doctor did as the man said and was blown away to hear the ankle plead, “Please, I just need five dollars. Lend me five bucks, please, if you will.”
“I have never seen anything like this,” the doctor said.”but it sounds to me like your leg is broke in three places.”
Puns
1. Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer the agony of defeat.
2. She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but broke it off.
3. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
4. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
5. The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.
6. He had a photographic memory that was never developed.
7. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
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